Alrighty, confession time. I’ve got issues. Probably “seek help immediately” issues with Facebook. I’m on it ALL day. I may not be watching or posting or updating every second of every day but I’m signed in, no doubt. It’s gotten so bad that while I’m at work, my Mom and my daughter and anyone else who needs me just sends a message on FB before attempting to call my cell because they can get in touch with me quicker. THAT is how bad it is.
Now notice, before you read my list, I am employed and I’ve managed to keep this job for quite sometime. Therefore, this list isn’t all about me, right? Yea, right.
TOP 10 SIGNS YOU ARE ADDICTED TO FACEBOOK (in no particular order…):
1. You have convinced yourself that spending inordinate amounts of time checking your ex’s profile isn’t really stalking but making sure he’s at last found happiness. NOTE: This one is probably the biggest load of crap on my list and I’ll tell you why. Any woman, or man for that matter, who says they want their ex to “find happiness” is full of crap. We don’t. What we do want to find is some sign he’s miserable so we can gloat on OUR page in hopes he’ll see it while scrolling through his newsfeed.
2. You’ve been fired from 12 different jobs because you spend more time on FB than you do working.
3. Your FB status updates have turned into “tweets” because you update it every five minutes.
4. You look forward to a “poke” on FB more than you do the bedroom.
5. You’ve recently realized you can’t remember that last time you spent any time with “3 dimensional people.”
6. You find yourself “liking” everything simply because you can’t stop clicking…including your own posts.
7. You’ve started plotting revenge on people who don’t “like” your photos.
8. You are sleep deprived because you get up 27 times a night to see if anyone has commented on your last status update or posted anything to your wall.
9. No way in hell you could ever grow vegetables in your own backyard but damned if you’re not “The King of the Plow” on Farmville!
10. Without FB, you’d never have a clue when anyone’s birthday is anymore.
Oh yea! Find me on Facebook! 😀